A. Assessing Your Priorities
1. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. Your work is not.
• A strong marriage is the foundation of a happy family and a fulfilling business life.
• A marriage will not work successfully unless you put a lot of work into the marriage.
• A marriage works not because a couple are compatible but because they are committed to make it work.
• Putting enough work into your marriage means putting enough time into it.
2. Parenting is the highest calling and responsibility in society.
• Its primary task is the formation of the moral infrastructure of a nation. Your business, though vital, falls only secondary.
• Preparing our children for the future is as essential as preparing a future for our children. The proper molding of their self-esteem, their moral character and convictions is essential to their future success and security.
• The character of a society is the reflection of the character of its homes. The home is the workshop of the nation and the index of its future.
3. Your work is important to the security and future of your family.
• The financial security of a home is also important to the emotional security of the wife and mother.
• Education is costly and yet is absolutely necessary for our children’s future.
• Providing sufficient food, housing, health maintenance, and recreation are essential to the normal psychological and physiological well-being and development of a family, especially the children.
B. The Keys:
– Meeting the Deeper Needs
– Taking Time
1. Meeting Your Family’s Deeper Needs
Common Misconception: The standard of measurement of a good father and husband is his being a good provider.
Quality time with your family is determined by how you meet the deeper needs of your family.
The deeper needs of a family are relational, emotional, moral and spiritual in nature.
Relational Needs: attention and affection
Emotional Needs: security, significance (affirmation)
Moral Needs: example, instruction, counsel
Spiritual Needs: Faith in God, inner moral accountability
Open – builds bonding and intimacy in the marriage and family. Communication is 80% listening, 20% talking.
Honest – builds and strengthens trust, which is foundational to any lasting relationship
Loving – affirming, appreciative, encouraging, thoughtful.
3. Taking Time
Take Time for you family:
• Avoid bringing your work home.
• Don’t forget to bring something home to your family from time to time.
• Spend regular time each week to enjoy meaningful conversation with your spouse and children.
• Regularly express affirmation and encouragement for your family members.
• When you’re home, serve your family to your best ability. Your home is not just a place of rest but also of fellowship and loving service.
• Go out with your spouse at least twice a month – best once a week. Be sure you talk about meaningful things during your date.
• Go out with your family at least once a month.
• Never turn down your spouse and children when they seek your help or assistance in any way. If you can’t give time immediately agree to a schedule and be sure to fulfill it.
• Keep your promises, even when it’s difficult.
• Put the happiness of your spouse foremost in everything.